Top life coach Carole Ann Rice from Real Coaching Co is one of the UK’s leading life coaches and personal development experts reveals her five tips for dealing with compulsive liars.
Roxanne Pallet’s wild time in the Celebrity Big Brother House has been the centre of attention after she alleged abuse from her housemate Ryan Thomas. Whether or not she lied about the incident, it’s important to realise that lying can have very serious implications for all.
1. Know that we all lie (to a certain extent) – “Does my bum look good in this?” your friend asks. Even if it looks saggier than a rotten tomato, you lie and say it looks great. But newsflash – we all do it! Whether if it’s to protect someone’s feelings or because you’re embarrassed, knowing that we all lie will help keep you grounded and not become too preachy on the matter.
2. Call out on damaging, harmful lies – but be careful. Gauge the lie they’re telling. If it’s simply, “I had an amazing holiday!” when you know for a fact they didn’t, you should probably leave it alone as it’s not harming anyone. They may lie out of loneliness or to look good. But if they lie about where they are to avoid situations, this can be hurtful to others and should be called out.
3. Gauge how hurtful the lies are, and if they deserve a second chance – you’ve called out your friend for their lie. They said they were at work, so they couldn’t make your party. But, they were actually out for drinks with Jessica, avoiding you. Although you might be hurt, decide if they deserve a second chance or not. Are they worth it? Give them three strikes, at least before you wave goodbye.
4. Enlist a witness – ask a mutual friend if they’ve noticed them lying recently. An impartial judge could correspond with what you’ve said and give you support if you confront the liar in question. Though, between the two (or more) of you, don’t be too confrontational. Be calm and neutral with the intervention, give the liar a chance to explain their actions.
5. If the confrontation isn’t worth it, know to move away – toxicity in any friendship can remove any sense of stability. If they’re constantly telling unsolicited lies about other people, or even lies about you, don’t stick around.
Find out more about Carole Ann Rice check out www.realcoachingco.com
